Tuesday, 6 July 2010

I am alone

Sometimes the past is better left in the past.
But always that advice comes from one who speaks from experience.
People always want more in their life
and when part of their past is missing it is natural to want to discover it.
Sometimes at any cost.
I have a hidden past.
Not hidden as much as it once was, but still hidden.
The parts I have learned, uncovered,
are proof positive that the past is better left in the past.
Still, I cannot seem to leave well enough alone.
Surely acquiring knowledge you were better off not knowing
does not entice one to continue on down that path? So why then?
Why must I continue this journey?
I suppose, because it is MY journey.
It is the only journey I have travelled.
I think it is natural, it is compelling,
to want to know all about each and every stop I made
on the journey that brought me to this point in my life.
Perhaps in doing this I will be more able to carry on, positively.
Perhaps not.
There is risk. Always.
But I have always liked taking risks.
Perhaps because I never knew the comfort of the known,
the unknown was just as enticing?
One regret. No matter how many people surround me, I am alone.
Why have I been burdened with such a curse as loneliness?

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